Greater The Facebook Spying, Greater The Heartbreak

Greater The Facebook Spying, Greater The Heartbreak.

Social media such as Facebook became ubiquitous in American society. Especially with the rise of smartphones, we are surrounded by constant news feed and status updates. For many years, people regarded finding romance online was not real and embarrassing. However, now it is becoming more common. The journal Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences indicates that 35% of married couple started their relationship online (usatoday.com). Now social media affects the romantic relationship from the beginning to the end.

Some argue using Facebook to surveillance ex would delay one’s ability to recover from the break up. In the Can Facebook Prolong Post-Beakup Pain article, the author Alan Mozes argues that stalking on ex partner delay emotion recovery and prolong post break-up pain (MedicineNet.com). He points out that stalking on ex on the Facebook correlates with current suffering after breakup. Additionally, Mozes argues that more and more people are using Facebook to surveillance their previous partner. He refers to study done in University of Western Ontario that reported that 88 percent of surveyed individual indicated that they used Facebook to monitor their previous partners. The study indicates people who  kept checking ex partner’s Facebook reported that they were stressed out because they were confronting without enough information (MedicineNet.com). Additionally in Facebook Post-Breakup: Bad For Your Heart? article, the author uses the journal Cyber psychology Behavior and Social Networking which indicates that one third of 900 million Facebook users are using Facebook to surveillance their ex-partners (USNews.com). This study also supports the argument that monitoring ex partner delays emotional recovery after breakup.

Others argue that this doesn’t necessarily prove using Facebook to monitor your ex partner leads to delayed emotional recovery. Jennifer Harman, assistant professor of applied social psychology at Colorado State University, argues that the people who are stalking their ex partner on Facebook are more emotionally distressed in the fist place (USNews.com). Jennifer Hall, professor of communication at University of Kansas, supports this argument and states stalking ex partner on Facebook is neither better nor worse than  any other methods of dealing with post-breakup distress.

In my perspective, I do not believe there is any better or worse ways of recovering from heartbreak. I believe taking time and understanding what went wrong in relationship would help one to recover and grow. I do not think stalking ex partner’s Facebook is necessarily bad. It could help one to comprehend what went wrong in relationship and why it did not work out. With time, it would eventually heal.

 

– SUNG WON KIM

Facebook’s feeds direct and indirect sharing, which way do Facebook users use when share information about their romantic relationships?

Sources:

Both sources talk about when people try to make decision about sharing positive news and negative news related to their lives and romantic relationships, they tend to share the positive news or posts indirectly and negative posts directly. I find this is a very interesting topic to talk about especially when it has connection with Facebook users’ romantic relationships with others. But, I only partly agree with the points of view of two articles’ authors. Sometimes, users also share positive posts and information directly and negative posts indirectly.

Stephanie Pappas mentioned that Facebook users are not bragging. That is true but if we see bragging in another perspective, we could find out that bragging on Facebook actually sometimes is a form of direct sharing. For example, a young man and a young woman announce their wedding date and they share the wedding information on Facebook to attract attention, this is bragging and people always are willing to share the information directly because something good are going to happen and people love good things. It is a good example to tell people that privacy sometimes can be properly shared directly and what makes this happen, is a kind of special romantic relationship between people and people. People may not have romantic relationship with their normal friends but the friendship is a unique form of romantic relationship between friends and friends.

Not all negative news and posts are shared directly, also. Recently, after Cristiano Ronaldo broke up with his ex-girlfriend, Irina Shayk, the news was not directly shared by people at the first time. Rather, this negative and sad news was shared and announced by media and Ronaldo and Irina’s clients. This breaking news then, after announced, was directly shared by people and fans on Facebook and Instagram. However, Irina Shayk did not say ‘we are done’ or something sad or negative on Facebook. Rather, she posted some pictures which depict the beautiful views in Maldives where she spent good time with her family on vacation there. This is another way to share negative information of news or events in a positive way and what Irina did was quite smart and directly shared by other people. Seeing negative information in positive perspective is another interesting thing that I found out in people’s romantic relationship on Facebook!!!

The two articles give me clear understanding on people’s attitude and factors which affect people while making decision on sharing positive and negative feeds, especially the second article with experimental data is more convincing than the first article to tell people the fact. I would like to say that romantic relationship is something about human emotions and emotions always are unpredictable. We need to stay objective when we see how people interact with different types of information of feeds.

What’s Your Status? The social implications behind your Facebook Relationship Status

With what used to require actually speaking to someone face-to-face, beginning, continuing, and ending a romantic relationship can now be achieved through a single click of a button. Updating your Facebook Relationship Status is an easy way to declare your newfound place on the dating spectrum, taking what used to be a private affair and turning it into a public announcement to be judged and commented upon.

So why do we bother?

The Facebook relationship status is a seemingly straightforward solution to a formerly ambiguous dating world. Before, individuals had to go so far as asking another person to date them. Now they can take their pick from Facebook’s provided drop-down menu of relationship statuses and just like that they’re ‘in a relationship’.

With many courtship clichés thrown out the window, the process of defining a relationship has become increasingly vague. The Facebook Relationship Status provides a tool for clarity and structure.

We’re dating. See? It’s ‘Facebook official’.

The term ‘Facebook official’ has become so ingrained in popular speech that it’s important to consider its social meaning. It goes beyond privately committing yourself to another and becomes a shout to the online world that you’re no longer romantically available.

A change in a relationship status can be a positive and healthy indication of commitment in a relationship, but it can also be a destructive mechanism within a relationship.

One moment you’re ‘in a relationship’ and the next ‘it’s complicated’? In just a few minutes, you told your significant other, as well as hundred of online viewers, that something might be wrong in your relationship.

If or when your status makes it’s next transition to ‘single,’ you’re heartbreak becomes a trivial post on someone else’s newsfeed and your left to answer to the handful of curious viewers asking what happened?

These labels that are used to define our romantic relationships create expectations for behavior and exclusivity within the relationship. When these labels are declared in a Facebook Relationship Status, those expectations are magnified and become available for public scrutiny.

Herein lies the consequence of broadcasting intimacy.